Oh my god. Weakness is the demon. But not weakness to food, weakness to my best friend, the love of my life.
She asked me if I was counting calories or noting them, and I said counting so she said okay just don't get obsessive and I said yeah and she said sorry to sound naggish and I was like it's okay.
I hate lying to her, I just wanna break down and tell her everything but...I know I can't. I've got to be thin, but I just hope I don't lose her along the way.
Managed to get hold of some minty gum. Chew chew. It's working wonders on my cravings for food.
So far no one suspects a thing, which is good, though I know that's probably because I've only been doing this for a week.
Not that I'm going to treat this like an ED because I don't think I have one and I'm not going to act like I have one because I think that's rude towards the lovely people on here that do have one.
But I'm not going to stop until I've at least halved my weight. So I'll keep you updated. Not just on my weight, on whatever happens to happen.
Never know, someone out there in this big wide world might actually find it interesting.
xXx
hey im lizzy, was reading one of ur previous posts. u said and describe how it is for me exactly. i dont think anyone has ever said it so closly to how it is for me. except it sounds like u have alot to offer, ur going to college and doing all that creative stuff?? i am not attractive, im not hugly ugly either, just plain. unnoticeable. invisible like. im not fat or skinny. im not good at art or sport or writing. im not good or talented at anything. i swear to u. MOST people have a talent at something, well not me!!the only think i belive i can offer is being skinny. and you know what why cnt people just admit that skinny is better!!????? man its frustrating. anyway i havnt actually posted for ages and ur blog struck a cord!! so hence the long comment. anyway i look forward to reading more about you!!
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